YSunday, February 1, 2009' 5:51 AM
hello:)
today morning suppose to go walk wif miran they all. but i over slept. sorry. hmm after that in the afternoon i go out wif yisi, fion, harwinder, zhi an and melvin. slcak at CWP. alright its far for me, but never mind. go walk walk to wait for the harwinder. hahas. that girl sleep till 4pm den wake up. hahas. pig leh. den after that meet till her liao, we go marsiling. cos yisi say wanna buy a hamster. but den in the end cannot find the hamster that she like. so never buy liao. den we go to the coffee shop to eat dinner. hahas. i never eat cos later go home need to eat. hmm after that go smoke. haiis. EMILY PRETTY. SORRY THAT I TAKE ANOTHER EXTRA STICK. THANKS THAT YOU FOGIVE ME. after that go home. actually andgry with that melvin. even till now oso angry lor. haiis. stupid.. f*** lor! haiis, after that yisi sms me. she say you noe became like this i very sian.. smoke and smoke until so much.. ask me to stop now cannot stop.. i very sad see you like this. haiis, when see this sms. i really very sad. but there is nothing i can say. because she is right. she oso say that i have change, fion lao po too. i noe that i have change. when i started to smoke i have already change. she oso said ask u to coem out u oso smoke smoke smoke... haiis. i noe that. but i just haiis.. actually i dunnoe if i can stop. because to say the tryth, i have not really try. i just say that i will quit, i will quit. just say only. never really try. so i dun blame them. zhi an say, ppl ask you dun smoke, but if you wan to smoke you can find all ways to smoke. nobody can stop. only you yourelf can. all this is up to yourself. i believe wat he say. and i noe that its the truth. because when i start to smoke is myself. nobody force me. i dun believe that once you start smoking u cannot stop. tats a lie, and a reason. to say the truth, i had wanted to use this as a reason or excuse. but den after wat yisi send to me. i deside to really stop. i will try. and wat lao po fion say too. i noe they dun wan me to smoke because its bad for me. and it dun solve any of my problems. i noe that i have not really additted to it yet, but if i ji xu. den it will really became part of my life already. maybe this time really is the time for me to stop already. shall really stop this time. i dun care if ppl believe me or not. but i will do it. i really must quit no matter wat it take. because i noe that there are ppl who is supporting me and dun wan me to do this to hurt myself.. i will do it. i won say try anymore... hahas!
